[Fan fiction competition] Pilot script for Netflix

The guards are approaching the pillar, when suddenly a loud cotton is heard and covers the whole area with thick smoke. Screams and stomp of the legs are heard. Through a veil, Cape sees how a person in a hood unleashes her ropes.

Cape
I don’t know who you are, but I’m ready ..

HUMAN
Give me a birthday card? After all, you say, beauty-consider that you won Jack-Pot.
BLACKOUT.

The basement of the castle. Cape and Feng stand in front of the table, at which the blond is sitting in the dandy camisole. Suddenly the second comes out of darkness – red and without eyebrows.

Stop
I suppose you have questions?

Feng
I do not like to start first, but I must admit that this is a very intriguing beginning for a very good joke. You can cast already?

Stop
After the snake, you will relax. This is a matter of public importance.

Feng
Then without me – thanks, of course, but Galun will not wash himself.

Cape
Yeah, keep in the know. So just we will not come out of here ..

Stop
And the cutie is smart!

Cape
You can’t even imagine how much, and I will not tolerate such statements by the sexist hara …

Stop
I don’t understand what you are bursting there, Milashka, but I like. But the hut, what we found with you is not very.

Feng
Ha, I had a similar case! Somehow we fell into a cabin, and she has in the pantalons ..

Cape
Power up there, Grease you! It will be difficult to explain ..

Stop
I’m all in anticipation.

Cape
In general, I am from another reality ..

DANDY
You heard Dennis? From another reality! Amazing!

DENNIS
Yes, my king, you are as always insightful. By the way, stormy, get acquainted with the ruler of the Kungur kingdom – Kelebing Great, the first name of this.

Kelebringo
I am the embodiment of the law!

DENNIS
Undoubtedly, my king. Continue, beauty.

Cape
What you found with me is a PDA with a teleport that I am trying to fix it to return home, because over the past six months, they have tried to kill me or take a dozen once a dozen times.

Feng
Pff, rob? https://gamblingdata.net/casinos/wolfy-casino/ Hold my beer ..

Cape
I would better hold you by the throat.

DENNIS
Well, well, children, do not quarrel-you still go to business together.

Feng
Speaking of the case – what the hell are we here ..

DENNIS
And you would prefer to hang out on a rope? I must say “thank you” that the king gave you such an honor.

Kelebringo
I am honored!

DENNIS
Exactly. But before we move on to the essence, I need to introduce you to someone else – guard!

The door opens, and the guard enters two people into the room. One tall, broad -shouldered and long -haired, with naked torso and leather pants. The second is low and thin, in a scrap and leaves woven from branches and the same strange shirt.

DENNIS
So, let’s start with a big man. The barbarian was caught by us when I robbed one of the border villages with a gateway. We do not know his name in view of an incomprehensible language, but, as far as I could make out, there was something about malt fields, so we call his violent malt.

Building malt
MVeeeeeh!

DENNIS
But perhaps he is just a beer alcoholic and emotional impotent – we have not decided yet. But the second copy is already more interesting, let me …

A man in a hat
A? What? There is no Downer!

DENNIS
Oh, so you know? What a turn ..

Cape
I saw his face in the database. He must have been in one of the early expeditions. The commander of the engineering detachment, worked on some secret project, but spent the budget and could not finish the work on time, the authorities were crushing, so he went to the Subolka and …

Daur
I will not finish anything! I am the Creator! The strength of nature on my side!

Cape
… apparently started off his head on the way.

DENNIS
Wow, but he introduced himself to the druid, and he had an excellent mash with him!

Cape
Yeah, what a relief ..

DENNIS
Finish with formalities. As you know, King Kelebringo ..

Building malt
Greee!

Feng
I agree with the previous speaker, closer to the topic – what do you want to sign us on?

DENNIS
Uh … briefly, you will have to get into the galperia ..

Feng
Oh no, no, no, don’t even ask!

Cape
And what is so? I was afraid to pick up marine disease?

Feng
For many years I robbed their merchant ships and I, as it were, are softer, I am not very happy to say it. In addition, the only thing that can be picked up there is herpes.

Cape
Well, then I will go, and you can handle it yourself.

DENNIS
Cope with what? With herpes? Unfortunately or fortunately, cutie, but for this work all four will be needed.

Cape
I am not a cute … Stop, again – you want to send me unknown where in the company of a pirate, a wordless pile of muscles and a crazy forester?! I refuse!

DENNIS
Your consent is not required, dear. You think we just gathered you, renegade?

Feng
Yes, I have the same question – why this circus? We are criminals who have long been sentenced.

DENNIS
That is why such a scum like you – thieves, scammers, crazy people – perfectly approach. Even if you are all killed, we will not need to spend money on the newsletter of flowers to relatives.

Cape
God, how cute.

DENNIS
You see, King Halperian IV strongly annoyed him to Majesty, kidnapping his valuable thing, and you will have to return it.

Feng
And if we refuse?

DENNIS
Uh … Then we will kill you.

Kelebringo
And remove the skin!

DENNIS
And remove the skin.

Feng
And why the skin is?

DENNIS
I don’t know – it’s more interesting and the will of the king.

Building malt
Brayeeeee?

Feng
Yes, how we will do it?

DENNIS
Oh, don’t worry – you will need a little little ..

From darkening:

The camera hangs over the panorama of a large, noisy city. The next plan – we see in detail how life is boiling on the city square, move along the counter and observe different merchants who sort their belongings, and then along the bridge, until we stop on our heroes – they are decisively going forward, as if a great adventure awaits them ahead.